Dear couponers, discount bloggers, and deal seekers,

It is quite sad that I have not blogged at all since Charlotte was born and I have A LOT of updates to catch up on. And I am sorry to say that tonight you are not getting any updates from me. Instead, you are going to get a little bit of a rant from me. I realize that there are going to be a lot of people that do not like what I have to say, they will have disagreements and arguments for some of my points, but this is my blog and these are my thoughts, so take them for what you will . . .

I feel like more and more these days with the increasing popularity of things like extreme couponing, deal shopping, thrifty thinking, etc., we sometimes lose a little perspective and thought for those people and businesses that are trying hard to keep our economy growing and trying to provide work for others.

It is quite often that I see online or hear in conversation people looking for the cheapest deal on carpet cleaning or lawn care or house painting. And although I totally understand wanting to find the "best price" for a service, I also think it is important to remember that there are two sides to every business transaction. It is important to remember that not only does the car salesman need to be fair with the car buyer, but the same respect needs to be shown the other way.

Too often consumers try to take advantage of businesses - and when it comes to small businesses, people will provide their services because they need the work or want to build good relationships and they need referrals, but all too often are losing money and sometimes eventually losing their business all together. 

I apologize that I'm about to get wordy here, but I wanted to share my own thoughts and experiences on the matter. I'm kind of a matter-of-fact person, so I'm going to try to just make a few points that I might try to more eloquently explain at a later time.

• My sister's father-in-law has always had some good advice when negotiating for things such as a car. "The best deals made are when you walk away feeling like you got a good deal, and when the seller walks away feeling like he made a good deal." (Or something to that extent - you get the point.) It is important to realize there are two sides to every purchase and every business transaction. My own father admits one of his weaknesses (if you want to consider it that) is that he doesn't "wheel and deal" with people. He doesn't think it is fair to talk people down to the point they are barely covering costs - or worse - losing money. It is something I admire about him. He supports business and commerce - he realizes that everyone has to make money somehow. Obviously, you need to find a balance because it is not fair for a consumer to be taken advantage of - thus the importance of research when shopping around for high-cost goods and/or services.

• I see shows like Extreme Couponing and it drives me CRAZY when people are so extreme that their balance comes to pennies or even in the negative to where the store pays them. That is not FAIR. Our country's economy is based on commercialism and free enterprise. How on earth is that supposed to keep going, if stores are the ones PAYING their customers rather than their customers paying them for goods that they are taking home. It is just a twisted and backward mentality that is plaguing our society right now. 

• I have been the manager of a small business for the last five years - a private medical practice. Being the manager, I spoke with MULTIPLE patients (almost on a daily basis) who were wanting a "break" for their medical care. They either wanted me to write it off because of their financial struggles, or give them a large discount, and the list goes on and on and on. I had many people talk to me with the assumption that because we were a medical office and Dr. Vincent was a doctor, there was plenty of money to spare. When in reality it was quite the contrary. In reality, it is a small business in a medical specialty that didn't allow us to just see patient after patient to help bring in money. The changes in healthcare policies and requirements and medicare reimbursements were constantly driving down what we got paid from health insurance while simultaneously requiring new software and compliance policies that were increasing our costs. Running a private medical practice these days is near impossible (financially) - thus the increase in large clinics and hospital owned physicians, as well as the increase in early retirement from independent physicians. My point in this is that not everything is as it appears. I think the general population looks at doctors and think they are just rolling in the dough. This is not always true. Dr. Vincent still had a business to maintain, regulations to meet, employees to pay, and could not and cannot afford to just "write-off" balances because her patients were facing their own financial difficulties. If she did do that, the business would, without a doubt, be bankrupt. 

• My husband owns a small business as well, and being in the industry that he is, he is CONSTANTLY being asked for free or heavily discounted services. I think that this happens A LOT with blue collar work. For some reason, there is this stigma that people shouldn't have to pay a lot for manual labor. When in fact, most manual labor is some of the most expensive service to provide. There are extremely high overhead costs with many of these businesses - for instance, Worker's comp. insurance is quite expensive to cover a construction crew; the equipment and tools are extremely expensive to purchase and to maintain; health insurance for a small business owner is expensive; and then there are the other general business expenses that all experience.  Although my husband could hire illegal immigrants for cheaper, he is honest and a law-abiding citizen, so he hires only legal citizens (requiring him to pay statutory matching payroll taxes) and tries very hard to pay them what they are worth (although sometimes we feel guilty that we can't pay them more for the intensive manual labor that they put in). Our livelihood and the livelihood of our employees now depends on customers being willing to pay for our services. However, that can be quickly taken away from us if we cannot compete with the "cheaper" immigrant down the street, or if our friends and family members will only take free or heavily discounted services. If you ask me, shouldn't we want to support local businesses? Shouldn't we want to support free commerce? Shouldn't we want to support our family members and friends? Shouldn't we want to do all these things, rather than trying to get everything for free or for cheap?

Like I said, I do think there needs to be a balance in frugal living and fairly paying for goods and services to keep our economy flowing.  Send a little reminder out that we need our economy to grow and to thrive, and that won't happen if we don't PAY businesses to stay in business.

By all means, continue to do what you need to do to save your own family money, but please also remember that those you are negotiating business deals with, are too, trying to do the same thing and provide for their own families.

P.S. I don't want this post to be taken in any kind of offense or as if I don't understand that a break can and should be given where deserved or that giving service or charity shouldn't take place, because I also firmly believe in serving others. Trust me, in both businesses I have been involved in, we have written off or discounted plenty of services when needed, and we have done it gladly and with open hearts. I just felt like a few of these points needed to be made to the general population in regards to most (not all) general situations.